I knew exactly what I wanted to do when my ECMP 355 prof. proposed a learning project that would entail learning something that I had very little knowledge of. Immediately, tattooing popped into my mind. My next door neighbor is a tattoo artist who had some old supplies that I could use and I was set! or, at least, I thought I was set. My first tattoo lesson was given to me by my neighbor himself and it was easy. To incorporate some technology into my learning process, I watched several videos of other people tattooing or learning to tattoo, on youtube. I thought everything was fine and dandy until I went for my second lesson with my neighbor. I wanted to show him how much I had learned from the videos and began a technique that I had learned from my technological source. I was concentrating hard and holding my breath, I didn’t want to mess up. I took the tattoo gun in my hand and slowly began to move it towards the fake skin (fake skin is a piece of special rubber used to mimic skin when practicing tattooing). Before I could even touch the needles of the tattoo gun to the fake skin sitting on the dining room table, my neighbor shouted, “WOAH WOAH WOAH!”. I jumped out of my seat and my knees hit the edge of the table. I looked up at my neighbor, unsure of what I could have possibly done wrong. He explained, in his gruff voice, that the angle of the tattoo gun was incorrect for the type of needles in the gun and that if I were tattooing a real person, it would have hurt like hell and looked horrible. He then went on a rampage about all the tattoo artists who try and teach themselves how to tattoo from apps or youtube videos and then screw up on the first real skin they tattoo. I was terrified and promised that I would no longer use technology as a source for learning how to tattoo.
After my near tattoo tragedy, I began to wonder what else one cannot learn from just the internet itself. I can tell you right now that I could spend a year studying karate and would be lost the moment I tried to physically attempt it. That could go for any sport actually. When it comes to learning anything, nothing can beat a good teacher and a textbook. Along with a good teacher, practice is vital. Unfortunately, not everything can be practiced using the internet, and the internet can’t always judge your progress- like in karate.
I tried to look for a list of things that can’t be learned from the internet, on the internet, but the only thing I ended up finding was that the internet doesn’t teach you what you can’t learn from the internet…
So I made my own list. I call it Things The Internet Can’t Teach You:
- How to tattoo
- How to be a karate master
- Any physical sport for that matter
- How to cook better than grandma (Let’s be real, nothing beats grandma’s cooking)
- How to be a doctor
- How to eat all the food in the world, never exercise, yet keep a hot bod without having surgery or doing something life threatening
- How to transport through time
- Why Donald Trump even exists
- Who I will marry
- How to outlive the earth